I used to fight all the time.
Not physical altercations. Mine were more internal.
I fought against the injustices of the world, the ways that institutions and people were hurting others…
I was one of those kids who would say, “it’s not fair!”
At some point, I stopped fighting. It was SO tiring!
What I began to do instead, was accept.
Accept myself.
Accept others.
Accept the world. (Ugh, I know that sounds hard, bear with me.)
If you’re exhausted from the fight, try acceptance.
It is NOT acquiescence.
It is NOT giving up.
It is merely a shift in perspective that opens us to see the world through new eyes.
If that sounds intriguing, here’s how.
1. Accept Yourself
As with everything, we must start with us.
Can you accept every single thing about yourself? The good AND the bad. The forgetfulness, anger, impatience. The thin hair, pointy chin, big feet.
Can you accept yourself even when you want to reject?
A simple affirmation such as, “I love and accept myself right now,” can help reorient to a place of surrender.
This isn’t about not changing or growing, it’s about loving yourself as you evolve.
2. Accept Others
I know how easy it is to judge other people. I do it, we all do it. Alas, it’s part of the human experience!
But what if, even for one hour, you stopped? Stopped judging the annoying driver who is weaving in and out of traffic. Stopped judging the CEO and his billions of dollars. Stopped judging your parent for leaving… You get the idea.
Try it. Consider it a challenge.
Can you go one hour and not judge another person?
Instead of judging, try acceptance. Accept them despite their limitations. Despite the fact that they are selfish, unaware, mean spirited, dysfunctional.
How does that feel?
3. Accept the World
This can feel hard. Especially when there is so much suffering.
Between raging against injustice and checking out or not wanting to know what’s happening, there is a middle place. This is the recognition that you don’t have to fix, heal or change anything.
You only have to love it.
Traveling through Ethiopia in the fall of 2019, I could see the pain in people’s eyes, the starvation, the desperation. Lack of food, opportunity, jobs. It was palpable. Being a sensitive person, I could feel it. It hurt so bad and all I wanted to do was make it better. But how?
What I later came to understand was that my job wasn’t to “fix it.” My job was to accept the experience I was having, no matter how painful, and bring love to it. The universal love that is readily accessible to all of us.
As we stop wanting to change ourselves, others and the world, and look at it all the way it is- good or bad- we let love in.
When we do that, our entire experience is transformed AND true healing takes place.
Why not give it a try?
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Image by Lukas Bieri, Pixabay