I have a client who, according to her, has the ideal life. She has her own business, doing something she loves. She has help with her child, and a supportive husband who financially bears the load of their life, and emotionally encourages her to pursue her passion. 

She doesn’t feel successful.

When I talk with her, I’m reminded of myself and a similar internal struggle I had for years! That persistent feeling that success alluded me.

Sound familiar?

Yes, it’s true that we are typically our own worst critics. When other people look at what we’ve accomplished or achieved, they’re often impressed. Yet we aren’t.

To understand my relationship with success, I decided to do a deep dive.

Here were some of the questions I used in my inquiry:

1. Does success mean making lots of money?

As in, is your product or business earning the financial goals you set?

2. Is success notoriety?

Are you mentioned in online forums, talked about, photographed, or have thousands or hundreds of thousands of followers?

3. Is success something derived externally?

4. What does true success feel like?

• Is it a sense of satisfaction or contentment?

• Is it the freedom to do what you want, when you want?

• Is it a relaxed work/life balance?

These questions are designed to help you unearth what your conscious and unconscious beliefs are around success. Because once you know them, you can decide if you want to keep them or get new ones!

It’s a funny thing, how we set goals based on success or happiness and measure ourselves against these ideas without really taking the time to explore exactly how we define them!

Value yourself enough today to stop and contemplate what success actually means to you.

You’re worth it.

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 Image by Afif Ramdhasuma on Unsplash